Client: “Why didn’t you call me over the holiday to see if I changed my mind?”
Clients From Hell
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2010-02-03
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Client: “We want a no-right-click script so people, by which we mean paedophiles, can’t save pictures from our custom gallery of kids.”
Me: “But the gallery has an ‘email me this picture’ form.”
Client : “That’s for parents.”
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Killer Jellyfish of Graphic Design Favors
Fun Fact: As a graphic designer, 92% of your time will be spent on unpaid favors.
Illustration by Tobias Lunchbreath
http://www.flickr.com/photos/lunchbreath/4194962172/sizes/o/
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2010-02-02
Client: “I need you to design me an internal company newsletter”
Me: “I’ll need the logo, brand guidelines, any relevant graphics and text.”
Client: “You’re not licensed to use them”
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First point in the brief of a client :
The website will be available online.
Yeah, we’ll see.
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Instant Web site! Just add water!
“I don’t understand. I gave you the content yesterday. Why isn’t the site online?”
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The client wanted packaging and ads for disposable razors designed. She wanted to develop a look aimed at the preteen age market. True story.
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2010-02-01
Lawyer Math
I was doing database work for a securities litigator, who once ran over and said, “OK, you have one week to show mathematically that $350,000 is more than $1,500,000.”
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Can you make this jingle sound more brown?
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I definitely want some scrolling phrases going across the screen on every page. Can you do that, maybe above a blinking photo of me in my catering gear?
